Daintree
Here I am in my mini hammock in our four-wheel drive on our way to cross the Daintree River in FNQ. I am having a rest 'cause we had just flown up from Sydney and I am just soooooo excited to be on holiday again. This time we are travelling with two Unkees, Peter and Mark, who live in Canberra and have organised this trip.
We stayed in a big house in the middle of the rainforest. I am sitting looking out over the beautiful garden. I kept a glass eye out for monkeys, but MUM said that there weren't any in FNQ. I got really confused 'cause the last time I was in a place where there were so many trees, it was in a jungle in South America and there were heaps of monkeys.
I didn't get upset 'cause there was this cute little bush mouse who lived in the house. He used to come out and play at night and was really sweet. I felt sad when we left 'cause one day a German tourist may stay at the house and hit 'bushie' with a saucepan thinking he is a rat 'cause he has a long tail.
Cape Tribulation
We moved further up the coast and found this lovely beach called Emmagen. I kept a look-out for crocodiles as there were heaps lying around and I was worried they would think I was a rabbit and want to gobble me up. As you can see in this photo, I am looking a bit worried.
I found this coconut husk and decided that if the crocs came out I could sail away back to Sydney. I wasn't sure which way to go and as you can see, I am just waiting for a big wave to come and make my mind up for me.
I ended up nearly drowning and MUM put me up in this weird tree to dry out. I was so happy 'cause I heard that crocodiles couldn't climb trees and by this stage I was feeling very tired and emotional.
I also spent a bit of time hanging out near crab holes. I tried to squeeze myself in and visit them, but I was too fat. A bit like MUM, but don't tell her I said that, PLEASE!
Imagine my surprise when I saw how big the crocs' teeth are. This was one on display near the crocodile boat tour. I couldn't stop yelling at the top of my voice - Achtung! - until finally I got a clip around my ears from you know who.
Everywhere on all the FNQ beaches there are these signs warning people not to swim and to watch out for crocs. I tried to cover this one over with a sarong and suggested to MUM to go for a dip as it was a beautiful sunny day. Needless to say I got another clip around the ears 'cause she had already seen the sign.
You see, I don't tell lies. This monster was sitting on the riverbank as we cruised past. It opened its eye and winked at me and started licking its lips, but got its tongue stuck in its huge teeth. I just kept my head down for the rest of the trip and said nice things to MUM so she didn't accidently drop me over the side of the boat.
Here I am with my new best friend. I call him Chump 'cause he reminds me of Kevin Rudd our current Prime Minister (I call Tony Abbott the Chimp, by the way). He just sits on top of a pile of bananas and BIG PEOPLE are supposed to leave money in his honesty box. Well, as you can imagine, he gets ripped off daily and he just sits there and smiles at everyone just like our PM, who also thinks people are going to be honest and vote for him. Hmmmm, time will tell.
I saw this great van driven by funny looking BIG PEOPLE who had hair which looked the same as the Rasta men in Grenada. They wanted me to join them in their travels and kept giving me funny cigarettes which I had to hide from MUM. I nearly forgot to throw them out when we flew back to Sydney. Imagine, I could have ended up in the slammer just like that poor lass in Bali.
My holiday reading was really good. I finished a biography on Pablo Escobar who was the cocaine king in Colombia. I remembered seeing the Botero painting of him in Medellin, where he was shot dead on the rooftop of his home. He was a real monster, but he did do some good things for poor people. However, he also killed anyone he didn't like. I often wondered how much it would have cost to get him to make MUM disappear, but I never got to meet him and find out. Ouch! I just got another clip around the ears. No wonder my fur keeps falling out!
In Aboriginal culture there is secret men's business. I found one of their sacred sites and I can't tell you anything about it 'cause I don't want to offend anyone. Respect!
I can't talk about this painting either.
Cooktown
In 1770, Captain Cook landed in FNQ and named this place Cooktown. He now has a lovely museum there and you can read all about his trip and how he fought with the local Aboriginals and then he made peace with them. He seemed like a reasonable chap, but he came to a ghastly end in Hawaii, a few years later.
If you look closely at this photo, you can see me sitting up in the remains of the tree to which Captain Cook tied his ship The Endeavour. The remaining trunk lives in his museum in Cooktown.
I saw this sign on the road out of Cooktown. It is just so weird 'cause I had never heard of cows attacking cars or using guns. It sure is a weird place up here in FNQ. If you look closely at this photo, you can see me in the bottom right-hand corner.
This is where we stayed at the Jowalbinna Rock Art Camp. I thought we were joining a refugee camp. It was soooooo cool here. No-one else around, no electricity and lots of wild animals circling the camp. To be honest, I was scared and it made me act really weird.
This is the camp fire we had to set alight to cook our dinner. I just kept looking at it and shaking my head. MUM started to drink her wine earlier than usual, before sunset, in case she couldn't see her glass in the dark. I was feeling mischievous, so I turned the baked bean cans upside down and the BIG PEOPLE all panicked 'cause there wasn't a can-opener in the camp kitchen. I was laughing my head off watching the city-folk get desperate.
All hell broke loose, so in the end I 'fessed up and turned the cans over. You have no idea how happy everyone was. Sometimes living in the middle of the city has its advantages. There are can-openers in the drawers at home and you don't have to worry about weird animals circling around at night - just weird humans in our neighbourhood.
As you can see, I don't tell lies!