London, Bologna, LUCCA, ROMA, SARDEGNA, Southern Italy, Greece, Torino and Amsterdam...
Before I hopped on the plane to fly to London, I selected this book at the airport shop. I got a mighty clip around the ears 'cause MUM thought I was reading a book about her. Oh dear, I knew I should have left it in the brown paper bag. The lovely lady at the shop did suggest that "I kept it under wraps". Now I know what that means. |
Here I am all wrapped up in MUM's carry-on luggage waiting to be zapped by the x-ray machine. It always makes my glass eyes go very bright for hours on end. Once a customs officer took me out of the bag and punched my stomach to see if I was hiding anything. As if... I was only six years old. What was he thinking?
When we finally got to London, I had the bestest reunion with my cuz Timmie. Last time I saw him, we went on a stately homes tour in Kent. He was soooooo excited to see me and was most impressed by my First Class luggage label. MUM snuck it onto her bag at the airport in Sydney, thinking it would come out first at the other end. There is a saying in life, 'never expect and you won't get disappointed'. Well, it was put into practice on this occasion.
We had a smashing time in London, even though we were only there for three days. The sun was shining and all the hippies were getting excited about going to the music festival at Glastonbury. Here's a couple all dressed up and ready to head off for three days of fun. I was glad I was heading off to Bologna to a fancy hotel with the BIG PEOPLE who were going to a film festival.
Here we are at the open air cinema in the main piazza in Bologna. It was just soooooo beautiful and I was snuggled up in MUM's bag and kept getting drops of wine spilt on my nose as she missed her lips in the dark. The festival poster featured two of Italy's famous film stars - Sophia Loren and Marcello Mastroianni - who were very beautiful when they were young. DAD still loves Sophia and MUM gets sad when she thinks of Marcello 'cause he is dead.
On the last night of the festival, The Beatles' film HELP was screened. The director, Richard Lester, was there and it was just fantastic as the audience were all tapping their feet. MUM was feeling nostalgic and kept plopping teardrops on my face. I think that she had too many vinos and was feeling a bit tired and emotional. She kept giving me extra cuddles, so I didn't complain.
MUM and DAD dragged me across Bologna to visit this garden dedicated to John Lennon and Charlie Parker. Even the locals had no idea where it was and I felt really sad when DAD told me what had happened to John Lennon. DAD also said that part of our journey was going to be a magical mystery tour, which is what the Beatles went on as well.
Here I am in front of the twin towers in Bologna. As you can see I was looking pretty worried 'cause they were quite tall and I kept looking out for any aeroplanes flying too close by. I wanted to climb up them, but MUM said that it would be too exhausting for her to carry me up all the stairs. Gosh, she can be soooooo lazy sometimes.
The BIG PEOPLE dragged me along to this gallery to look at some really weird paintings. I thought this one was absolutely smashing. I wish I knew this bunch of weirdos. I think I may get Auntie Lynda to make me a ruffle collar and I'll starch my ears so they stand up straight. It could be my new look for spring. What do you think?
I thought all my birthdays had come at once when I saw this little Fiat all decked out with roses and a sash, but MUM said it was decorated for a wedding. We hung about for a while to see the lucky couple, but we think they were busy having a slap up lunch. I was going to offer to drive them home if they had drunk too much vino.
We visited a lovely little hilltop town near Lucca called Motrone. At the front door of a friend's house there was this nest full of the cutest birds. They kept staring at me and I wanted to climb up and give them all a hug and then stuff them in MUM's bag and take them back to Sydney so they could all live in the cupboard with the rest of the family. I (of course!) got a mighty clip around the ears when I suggested this to you know who...
We eventually caught the train down to Rome, one of my favourite cities. I was soooooo excited 'cause MUM and DAD took me for yet another visit to the Pantheon, the bestest building I ever did see. It was full of tourists and they all ignored the SILENCE signs. Sometimes BIG PEOPLE can be really rude. Not like bears, we just keep quiet until we want something and then we purr like great big pussy cats.
I made friends with Giancarlo, who is the doorman at the Hassler Hotel. He took me for spins around Centro Storico in his Smart car. We used to yell out "ciao bella" to all the pretty girls and he sometimes used to say the same thing to some of the chiccos (cute boys) hanging around the Spanish Steps. Giancarlo is a real Italian 'cause he loves anyone who is a good looker.
After our visit to Rome, we went on a Grimaldi ferry to Sardegna. I think the ferry was owned by the Monaco Royals and it was like a luxury cruise liner. I made friends with a barman who slipped me a few Aperol Spritzes. My nose was so red by the time we disembarked and MUM told me to stop yelling "ciao bella" to anyone who walked past. I was feeling no pain, except I did have a sore head for the rest of the day.
I loved Sardegna 'cause I spent most of my time sipping Aperols under a brolly on the beach. I can't remember much about the place, but I do know that MUM said I was likely to end up in rehab if I didn't mend my ways. Here's a picture of me sitting on a train whizzing along to catch the ferry to Sicily. I was trying to count my toes. It took me a while to remember that I didn't have any and it just goes to show that you can have too much of a good thing sometimes.
Here I am on top of a hop on hop off bus in Palermo, Sicily, the heart of mafia country. It was soooooo hot and I was happy to feel the wind through my fur. I kept looking out for Don Corleone and gave a knowing nod to any old men I saw wearing thick gold chains around their necks. I wanted to buy a horse's head and stick it in MUM's bed, but I couldn't find one and then I thought it would be a bit cruel, for the horse...
I saw this graffiti in the town square and asked MUM what it meant. Her Italian comprehension is hopeless and she told me it said that the mafia are looking to hire recruits, especially grubby teddies who look like they have been hanging with street kids for a while. I made sure that I kept my nose clean for the rest of our stay. DAD told me what it really said when we finally left town.
When we were sipping Aperols watching the sunset in Syracuse, a gypsy came along and plonked this budgie on my head. I wondered if it had been lurking in Tony Abbott's underpants, so I was a bit worried. The gypsy got really cross with DAD when he wouldn't cross her palm with five euros. I had to wriggle my ears to give the poor ol' budgie the chance to fly off. I can't repeat here what the gypsy said to us as she scurried away. It was in Italian and I recognised some of the bad words.
Here I am at the train station. I was trying to book tickets to go to our next stop, Noto. My paws kept slipping off the screen and we ended up in Not, instead. Well, MUM said we did, but she was only mucking around. She tried to convince me I had made a mistake by taking this photo of me in front of the sign at the station. I paid her back by taking this photo of her at the Chiesa Immacolata. She looks pretty, don't you think?
We then moved along the Sicilian coast to Taormina which is a very beautiful playground for rich BIG PEOPLE. MUM and DAD had bought tickets to see a band from the 80s called Simple Minds. I asked MUM if they named it after her. I got a 'you know what' for that comment. However, it was worth it as they were brilliant.
They played in a wonderful old theatre called Teatro Antico which looks over the Strait of Messina. If you look closely, you can see the lead singer whose name is Jim Kerr. He owns a hotel on the hilltop at Taormina. I so wish I was his bear! If you look even closer, you can see a fan taking a 'selfie' in front of the band. I guess he then updated his Facebook page to impress all his friends.
Taormina has the bestest postcards. Many years ago, a German photographer called Wilhelm von Gloeden, took photos of Sicilian boys who had forgotten to put on their pants and even today you can buy the cards. I collected a couple of them, but MUM put stars over their nude bits so that I can put them up on my site without causing a fuss. How weird are BIG PEOPLE? We bears walk around without pants on all the time and no-one seems to mind.
Here I am lying on my bed at the Casa Blanca in Reggio di Calabria. I am waiting for the BIG PEOPLE to drag me off to yet another museum. Honestly, days like this I wish I was back in Sydney going to school, 'cause at least I could have a sleep and pretend I was listening to the teacher ramble on. That's the advantage of having glass eyes, one always looks like they are awake, 'cause you can't close them. |
Apart from the 'ndrangheta, Reggio di Calabria is famous for the naked, bearded, Bronzi di Riace, or Riace Warriors. They were discovered by a chemist from Rome when he was snorkelling in the sea at Monasterace. They had been lying undiscovered for a long time, no-one knows for how long, but historians believe they were cast around 400 years BC.
DAD had tears in his eyes when he saw them as they were really fantastic and he had wanted to visit them for ages.
DAD had tears in his eyes when he saw them as they were really fantastic and he had wanted to visit them for ages.
We finally made it to this beautiful town on the coast called Scilla. I thought I was re-living my time in Cambodia and India when this lovely young man offered us a ride in his Italian version of a tuk-tuk. It was bright blue and matched the colour of the sea and his t'shirt! Italians sure know how to make things look good.
Here's a picture of me outside our lovely hotel called La Locanderia. I was having the bestest time, but that night all hell broke loose...
MUM and DAD came back from a yummy dinner at a local fish restaurant down by the water. This cat had been hanging about scrounging bits of whitebait. MUM thought it was soooooo cute and after she'd had a few vinos, decided to bring it back to the hotel and give it a bath, as it was a wee bit grubby. Well, the cat went berserk and made a run for the balcony (the one I am sitting under in the previous picture) and unfortunately I got in its way. |
It grabbed me in its claws and scratched my glass eyes. I was blinded for the rest of my stay. Now when I see a stray cat, I get really anxious. MUM said I should have put my paws up to save my face. I got a clip around the ears when I asked her why she didn't practise what she preached and did the same to hers. Here's a picture of me looking mighty miserable and feeling very sorry for myself.
After Tropea, we went further along the coast to Pizzo, which is where the former King of Naples, Joachim Murat (who happened to be Napoleon's brother-in-law), was imprisoned in the Castello Murat . Here's a picture of me looking over the castle from my room at our B and B. He was shot to death in 1815 and now you can visit the museum and lie next to a waxwork of him and afterwards go and have a slap up gelato to forget about the sad history of the town. In both these photos, I did just that. I lay on the bed and then gobbled up a double chocolate gelato afterwards. |
Oh happy days! I got the biggest surprise when we arrived in Cosenza. Auntie Penel flew in from London to join us on our travels and she brought Timmie with her. He was a little bit stressed out 'cause he thought he may have DVT, after being plonked in her suitcase and travelling in the hold on the aeroplane - not like me, always plonked in MUM's bag. I sent all his worries away in a cloud when I reminded him that we have no veins as we are only stuffed with cotton-wool. As you can see in this picture, he looks mighty happy, if a little jet-lagged.
We caught a bus to Matera in Basilicata. It was the spookiest place, full of sassi or caves set below the rim of a yawning ravine. Many have been restored as fancy homes, restaurants and swish cave hotels. It is one of the oldest towns in the world and is now a Unesco World Heritage Site.
We were dragged around lots of caves which included this church and a gallery. We saw a really sad exhibition by Antonio Paradiso who used some of the steel remains of the Twin Towers in his sculptures. Then we went to another gallery showing photos from the film, 'Christ Stopped At Eboli', by Francesco Rosi. It was filmed in Matera, in 1979. Here I am checking out the handsome Gian Maria Volonte. Boy, was he a good looker, or what?
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In the heel of the boot of Italy is an island called Gallipoli, not to be confused with the one in Turkey. It is connected to the mainland by a bridge and lives up to its Greek meaning, 'beautiful town'. Lots of cute Italian tourists hang out there and they stay up very late at night - as you can see in this picture. The one next to it shows me and Timmie trying desperately to get some shut-eye, 'cause unlike Italians, we bears need our beauty sleep!
We spent a lovely afternoon at Otranto, which has a violent history. It was the main port to the east for 1,000 years and was once besieged by an invading Turkish army who beheaded 800 locals. Yikes! Our guide book says that the only scary thing now is the number of tourists on the beach. MUM bought these 'designer' sunglasses off a gorgeous African man who was selling them on the beach. I kept borrowing them as they made me look soooooo cool. I spied on the signoras in their (real) designer sunglasses, walking through the water puffing on their ciggies and (can you believe it...?) dropping their butts in the sea when they had finished. No wonder some of them have mouths like a cat's bum.
By the time we reached the beautiful baroque town of Lecce, we were just exhausted. Here's a pic of me and Timmie lying on our bed resting up before we headed off to look at all the churches. We were staying in this fabulous 17th century palazzo which is now a B and B, owned by a lovely man called Mauro.
Apart from all the old buildings in Lecce, there were also many fabulous shops. MUM wanted to buy these shoes until DAD said she would look ridiculous and, to add salt to the wound, he suggested she wore the chandelier in our room on her head as a hat. There were many hours of silence following that remark, except for the muffled giggles coming from under the pillows where me and Timmie were hiding.
The next thing we knew we were off to Greece to an island called Spetses. It is where rich Athenians have their holiday homes and Auntie Penel had the keys to a villa on the island. We were soooooo excited as, firstly, I had a wonderful time on Santorini when I was on the cruise three years ago and, secondly, Timmie was going to get a first-hand experience of another place in Europe. We played dress-ups and made ourselves look like a couple of old Greek widows.
I had told Timmie all about the wonderful Grimaldi ferry we caught to Sardegna and he got extra excited 'cause we were sailing on the same line to Greece. Imagine my surprise when we got on board the ferry which was like a refugee boat. Not that I have ever been on one, but I see them on the news. It was chokka-block with people from Albania going back to the ol' country. In these pictures, we are mesmerized by the islands in the blue, blue sea and in the other picture, we are pretending to be interested in the conversation we were having with a bunch of guys who were smoking funny cigarettes and kept eyeing off our suitcase. Well, they would have, if we had one.
We survived the journey which took us 33 hours from Italy to Spetses, but it was worth it! We stayed in a beautiful villa up in the hills and me and Timmie nicked MUM and DAD's sunnies and lay around in the pool. Everything in Greece is so blue. To add to being in paradise, it was my birthday the day after we arrived. I turned seven. How cool is that?
DAD bought me my first camera. I can only use it when it is perched on my nose as my arms are stuffed with cotton-wool and don't work properly. I take fantastic pictures of the sky and tall BIG PEOPLE. MUM bought me a set of worry beads. She said they are just as important and me and Timmie wore it as a necklace as neither of us could move the beads 'cause, well you know why. We both put on a worried look for this picture, to match the beads. The BIG PEOPLE decided to go for a day trip to Hydra. It was soooooo hot. This poor donkey was trying to cool his nose up against a wall while having a siesta.
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We had such a smashing time on Spetses. We zoomed everywhere on our quad bike, which just happened to be blue! On the last day we hung out on the beach at Kaiki. Greeks really know how to party at the beach, just like Italians! There are always bars full of food and vino. Me and Timmie got stuck into everything and ended up passing out. It only took us three seconds. MUM said there is a movie of the same name coming out soon. Maybe it's named after the book Timmie was reading. He said he can't remember anything about it, but that's okay 'cause his head is stuffed full of cotton-wool.
On the way back to Italy we stopped off in Delphi. We had the scariest ride up the mountains to get there. We stayed at a hotel overlooking the Phocis Valley looking towards the Corinth Canal. MUM made me sit on our balcony to take this picture. As you can see I am looking a wee bit nervous as it was a bit windy. We spent the next day checking out the archaeological site that hugs Mount Parnassus. The story goes that Zeus, who was the father of the Gods, sent a couple of eagles on a mission to drop the Navel of Gala onto the centre of the earth. The eagles crossed over Delphi and that's where they dropped it. I reckon they were tired and the stone was too heavy.
After Delphi, we caught the ferry to the island of Corfu. We had a smashing day visiting Archilleon, also known as Sissi's Palace that was built as a summer retreat for the Empress of Austria, Elisabeth of Bavaria. She loved everything beautiful and had heaps of statues including this one of Achilles in her garden. As you can see, he forgot to put his pants on too! Maybe he was a bear in a previous life. I slid down one of the bannisters in the place and the guard told me off, but forgave me when I told him I was the cleaner's son and was just dusting the railings. I saw this beautiful picture of Maria Callas, the famous Greek opera singer, in one of the galleries. The opera singer and the empress were both sad ladies. Maria died of a broken heart and Sissi was assassinated.
In this picture I am looking very fuzzy as the BIG PEOPLE just broke the news that we were going back to Italy on the same Grimaldi ferry. I was not too happy 'cause it was going to be another loooooong journey and I didn't even have Timmie to hang out with. He had flown back to London to sit on his windowsill in Wandsworth and wait for me.
Our first stop was at this amazing place called Alberobello, in Puglia. It is known for its beehive shaped roofs. All the cones had symbols painted on them. I was hoping I'd spot one of a teddy bear, but there were only spooky ancient symbols, as you can see in the big picture.
In this picture I am in a church in Locorotondo. It is a really picturesque town. All the houses are painted white and many have beautiful flower boxes on their terraces. I decided to hop up and have a chat with this saint as he looked really nice and friendly. It turns out that he was a friend of Saint Francis, who loved animals and this one whispered to me that teddy bears were his favourite. I got a bit nervous and nipped back into MUM's bag after that comment.
Further along the coast we stopped at Trani. This has to be one of the bestest towns in Puglia. It is made of white sandstone and is so beautiful. I am sitting on the wall along from the Cathedral. I had just gobbled up this smashing lunch and was enjoying the warm sun and the colour blue, which I think is my favourite.
Our journey took us to the northernmost point on the coast of Puglia to a place called Vieste. We went on a boat trip around the Gargano Promontory and checked out all the grottoes along the seafront. It was a beautiful day and the captain of our boat kept sailing into sea caves. As you can see in this picture, I was having a smashing time surrounded by my favourite colour.
Here I am after another totally scary ride up a winding road to reach the pilgrimage of Saint Michael on Monte Sant'Angelo. I had just been into the basilica of this church and rubbed holy water all over my legs hoping for a miracle. As you know, my legs are stuffed with cotton-wool and they are very wobbly, especially after a few drops of vino. I think it may have worked 'cause all of a sudden I am in focus again. Grazie Dio!
We left Southern Italy and caught the train to Torino. It is full of fabulous museums which house amazing collections of stuff, like this first picture taken in the Armeria Reale, a wing of the Palazzo Reale, which had a room full of stuffed horses. When we went to the Basilica di Superga, I found this teddy bear sitting on a desk in a priest's office. He didn't say much, but he was very cute. I also found this statue in the Palazzo Madama, which houses the Museum of Arte Antica. It made me feel sad because everyone was crying. MUM told me it was a statue of Jesus and his MUM and a couple of friends. She then told me what had happened and I had to lean up against Jesus to recover from the shock.
After Torino we headed up to Amsterdam. What a smashing place it is. There are three main things to do there. Apart from visiting the fabulous galleries and the new Eye Film Museum, they include a walk alongside the canals, a bicycle ride in Vongel Park and a visit to a smoking den. The Dutch don't get upset about the latter, not like in the Land Down Under.
The next three days got a bit messy. DAD bought some stuff from the smoking room. When he came home after a busy day sightseeing, he found me lying on the bed with his stash on top of my tummy. Instead of giving me a hard time, he gave me a green lollipop, which he said was more suitable as young bears shouldn't smoke! However, I got a clip around the ears from MUM when she found this Cannabis Starterskit in her handbag. I had stashed it there and fortunately (for her) she found it before we went through security on the Eurostar. I kept trying to tell her I thought it was a tulip start-up kit, but she wasn't prepared to accept any fibs.
When we were in the buffet car on Eurostar travelling through Belgium, I met Tin Tin's dog, Snowy. He was with a Japanese couple who got so excited when they met me and took heaps of photos. No doubt I will end up on another dodgy website for stuffed toys, like the time in Turkey years ago. You can see in this picture why he is called Snowy 'cause he makes me look quite grubby.